It takes a tremendous amount of faith to see through all of the things that are presently before you. One of the anchoring thoughts that should flash back every time the panic button goes off is: God would not have brought me this far to leave me. It is hard. Yes, there are some learning experiences along the way. Something inside of you may have to be resolved or changed. The same lesson may appear until this happens. It is just so so hard to see these things unless you pause. Stop. Listen for the whisper. Hear it in a song. See it unfold before your very eyes. That is when you know God is working. He is behind you. Call out to him. Praise him. Thank him. And know that Jesus died for your sins. Shame should not be in the picture if it is it is a smoke screen. Envy should be nowhere in sight. That too is an enemies fiery dart. Disappointment, fear, anger all part of the disillusion. Trust, faith, joy, laughter, charity, kindness, heart. All descriptions of Gods world.
Psalm 7:14 Whoever is pregnant with evil conceives trouble and gives birth to disillusionment.